Well, this post will be TMI of a different sort…

I haven’t blogged in a week, nor have I done much visiting of friends’ blogs – sorry! Truthfully, it was a rough week, in different ways. But it was a rough week of my own making, and I just couldn’t bring myself back around the blog, because last week’s topic was mocking me. Word to the wise: Don’t ever blog about how good you are at taking criticism – maybe don’t even whisper it in a darkened, empty room – because it is just tempting Fate to prove you wrong.

And honestly, the “incident” that proved me wrong is not something I would normally blog about – and I don’t plan to blog about it in any real detail, sorry! – but if I don’t own up to it and just leave that post below unamended, I will really feel like the biggest hypocrite ever. So suffice it to say, there are times when I do not take criticism in stride. There are times – rare times, I hope – when I let it trip me up and send me sprawling face-first in the most ungraceful and embarrassing fashion. And then, to my shame, immediately look around for someone to blame. Because someone must have pushed me, right? I do not just go sprawling face-first for no reason. Not me.

Heh. Yes, evidently sometimes I do. I am both clumsy and human, what can I say?

There, I have told unburdened my conscience – albeit in the most annoyingly cryptic fashion, I realize. Let your imaginations run wild, and I’m sure you’ll come up with stories that are far more interesting than the reality. You’re writers, after all.

Anyhow, the turkey is me this week. 😛 But the whole thing has taught me a good lesson about being more appropriately thankful for feedback I receive. I am trying to remember that the gift of someone’s well-intentioned, honest response is always just that – a gift. And whether I see an immediate use for that gift or not, the appropriate response is always thank you – because every gift represents thought and effort on the part of the giver.

In that spirit, I thank all of you who left comments last week that went unacknowledged while I was sprawled out face-down on the sidewalk.


Got any true confessions to make, for the good of your soul? Failing that, fun plans for Thanksgiving?

I don’t know what we’re doing for the holiday yet. Mr. Dare may be working. Wah.


20 comments to “TMI Tuesday – Turkeys and Thanksgiving”

  1. Maggie Robinson
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    · November 20th, 2007 at 5:20 am · Link

    Hope the bruises are healing. Darn life with its ups and downs. And when someone says adversity builds character, I just want to smack them. Likewise, “you wouldn’t appreciate the sunshine without the rainfall.” BS.

    No confessions today (a first). Still thinking about the hotel room in Paris. We’re having Thanksgiving at my house, where I hope to remember which side dishes I’m serving. I do have a written list. Everyone will be passing Sadie around the table with the cranberry sauce. Happy Thanksgiving to you and all the Dares!



  2. Gillian Layne
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    · November 20th, 2007 at 6:22 am · Link

    Yeah–what Maggie said. (g)

    I’ll keep my fingers crossed for your dh not working. I’m sure you’ll have a great holiday anyway with the little ones.



  3. India Carolina
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    · November 20th, 2007 at 7:17 am · Link

    Happy Thanksgiving, Tessa! Okay, here’s my answer to last week’s question: I don’t take criticism as well as I ought to.

    There, a little late, but I’ll own up to it.

    You know there’s plenty of turkey at my house, too, (if you get my meaning). We could baste together.
    Or maybe marinating would be more fun.

    Here’s hoping Mr. Dare can be with you. You can always hop a plane and come hang out with us, you know.

    This Thanksgiving, I’m thankful for family and friends, and something I never knew about before a year or so ago: CPs!



  4. CM
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    · November 20th, 2007 at 9:33 am · Link

    Everyone’s a turkey from time to time. Like me. *raises hand* Sorry!

    But at least on Thursday, I get to have dinner with Mr. Milan–who is, sigh, also working during the day (but thankfully not on call).

    And I’m going to make turkey with sausage-cranberry stuffing and sage-creme-frache mashed potatoes and gravy and a really great salad and roasted asparagus.

    Also a yuzu-apple tart with basil ice cream for dessert.

    Mr. Milan does not know any of this. Mr. Milan just knows I said I would have dinner for him when he comes home. Hopefully, Mr. Milan does not read comments on your blog, or the surprise will be spoiled.

    The other surprise for Mr. Milan is that he is going to do all the dishes.



  5. Tessa Dare
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    · November 20th, 2007 at 10:23 am · Link

    Mr. Milan is a lucky guy. That sounds amazing!

    And Maggie, you’re making me nostalgic for last year, when my own baby was small enough to be passed around. Now he’s just running around and scaling every chair/table/bookcase/baker’s rack in the house.

    India, I think we should deep-fry our turkeys with extra salt. 🙂

    Gillian, Happy T-day to you and yours, too!



  6. Keira Soleore
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    · November 20th, 2007 at 10:40 am · Link

    T-Day: Gorging
    T Night: Indigestion
    T+1 Day: Shopping
    T+2 Day: Tree selecting, buying, decorating
    T+3 Day: Snoozing
    T+3 Evening: Panicking over addressing, stamping, and sending out 120+ cards that have still to be bought.



  7. doglady
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    · November 20th, 2007 at 1:18 pm · Link

    Use the ten year rule, Tessa. Whatever little faux pas you had, will it matter ten years from now? No? Then fuggedaboutit! Life is WAY too short to do otherwise! I have to work on Thanksgiving so Mr Dare has my sympathy if he has to work. Fingers crossed that he won’t. I have to agree that Mr. Milan is one lucky fella. That meal sounds scrumptious! Except for the first day I think I will follow Keira’s schedule. With one major exception. I will be getting my Golden Heart ready to throw in the mail. EEEEEEEEK! What the heck was I thinking?



  8. Lenora Bell
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    · November 20th, 2007 at 6:15 pm · Link

    yuzu-apple tart with basil ice cream
    Damn, CM! That sounds delicious even though I don’t know what a yuzu is.

    We are hosting some teachers from China this Thanksgiving so it should be a fun cultural exchange.

    I’ll be trying to push my nanowrimo up to winning levels.

    Good luck with Golden Heart submissions!



  9. Elyssa Papa
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    · November 20th, 2007 at 6:31 pm · Link

    Crossing fingers Mr. Dare won’t have to work, too. CM’s meal sounds great… now we all know who’ll do the cooking when we meet up. I have no problems in doing dishes. That’s why God invented the dishwasher.

    I love the smells of Thanksgiving—the spice of pumpkin, the buttery slide on a biscuit… the sweets.

    I’m thankful for friends, both old and new. I’m also thankful that my CPs are fabulous and will listen to my whining and b**ching on and on and on without rolling their eyes too much.



  10. Marnee Jo
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    · November 20th, 2007 at 8:04 pm · Link

    Tessa – last year at this time mine was that small too and now he’s all over too…. Kids grow up too fast. I hope you’re feeling better about all.

    CM – wow, that sounds ridiculously yummy. I’m making dinner for my fam (12) but it’s not that exciting, I can assure you.

    And I hope both of you get your DHs for Turkey Day dinner.

    For the rest of you, Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours. I’m thankful I get to hang out with you guys and we can share our writing ups and downs.



  11. terrio
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    · November 20th, 2007 at 8:22 pm · Link

    Did Marnee just suggest the main course I think she did?

    Hope all is better, Tessa. I don’t know what you dealt with but I know I’ve felt about an inch tall more times in my life than I can count. We usually return to normal size pretty quickly. *g*

    Not working but not doing anything else T-day either. Wee One is half way cross the country with her dad so I’m hoping to get a wonderful day of writing done. Whether that writing is on a WIP or a 10 page research paper due in just over a week, I can’t be sure.

    Happy Thanksgiving to all and everyone eat some turkey for me. That way I can have all the goodies and none of the calories. LOL!



  12. Santa
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    · November 20th, 2007 at 9:28 pm · Link

    Tessa – Like the great Roseann Rosannadanna always said–It’s always something!

    CM – you’re a foodie after me own heart!

    Maggie – is it wrong for me to be thinking of that hotel room in Paris. Maybe it is – three being a crowd and all!

    Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Enjoy the day – how ever you choose to celebrate it. Happy Shopping to all those Black Friday shoppers!



  13. Tessa Dare
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    · November 20th, 2007 at 10:37 pm · Link

    Keira – wow, such industry. I hate shopping, and I don’t do Christmas cards – at least not in any organized or timely fashion. So I think the gorging and snoozing parts are where I’ll focus my energies. 🙂

    Doglady – I don’t know what you were thinking, but I know what I am thinking – that you are a shoo-in for the GH finals.

    Lenore, I’m so glad I’m not the only one who’s clueless about yuzus. Perhaps your Chinese exchange students will know?

    Ely, I love T-day smells, too. Fall is my favorite season, in large part because it’s so aromatic.

    Marnee Jo – I’m thankful that we’re all here for each other, too. A year and then some after FanLit, and the friendships keep growing! It’s awesome, and a true blessing.

    Terri – you have such a dirty mind. I like that about you. We must sit next to each other at workshops in SF. Last week, I was driving CM and India crazy because I giggled every time they described a hero as “rigid”.

    Santa – Happy Thanksgiving to you, too! I admire anyone who braves the malls this weekend.



  14. Ervin A.
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    · November 21st, 2007 at 2:55 am · Link

    Just wanted to wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving. So, um, Happy Thanksgiving! I’m cooking the turkey this year for the family…because I cooked it last year and it turned out awesome, so everyone’s coming back this year. My girlfriend would be cooking the turkey, but every time she steps into the kitchen she nearly poisons us. Plus, I’ve been watching a lot of Top Chef, so I’m, like, a master chef now. All the best to you, Tessa, and to all!

    ….Ervin…



  15. Sara Lindsey
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    · November 21st, 2007 at 9:02 am · Link

    Don’t you DARE let this get you down during the holidays! Think of your husband and your beautiful children! And the fact that I’ll soon be in LA to take you out for a celebratory meal… 😉 Happy Thanksgiving!



  16. Tessa Dare
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    · November 21st, 2007 at 9:28 am · Link

    Sara, yes – we must get together! Email me and let me know your schedule. And I’m not down, I’m just appropriately humbled. 🙂

    Ervin – every time I read one of your comments, I start giggling. And then Mr. Dare gets all, “what is so funny?” And then I say, “Oh, something Ervin wrote.” And then it’s, “Just who is this Ervin guy anyway? Hmph.” It’s too cute.

    But speaking of just who is this Ervin guy – OMG, I just found your blog last night! And I have to go back when I have time to start reading from the beginning and savor each sordid detail, but I can’t wait.

    Happy Thanksgiving, everybody! Yikes, I have to brave the grocery store today….



  17. CM
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    · November 21st, 2007 at 10:07 am · Link

    Waiiitt…. Ervin has a blog?

    Tessa, speaking of TMI, you neglected to mention that this discussion of rigidity occurred in a hot tub, when I was losing all my towels to the airjets.

    And yes, the hero is very rigid. I’m leaving him very, very rigid for far too long. 😉



  18. Tessa Dare
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    · November 21st, 2007 at 10:36 am · Link

    Funny, I thought it was Amy’s hero – or villain? – that was rigid, and we discussed it over guacamole. Actually, I think it was both. All good heroes should be rigid, anyhow.

    And explain the yuzu already, you tease!



  19. CM
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    · November 21st, 2007 at 11:23 am · Link

    I recall laughing about rigidity a lot. So both of us may be right.

    Yuzu is a citrus fruit, from Japan. The taste is closest to lime, although it has a “fuzzy” undertone. They don’t grow here and they don’t transport well, so unless you special order yuzu juice(I do) or dried yuzu powder (I do that, too), you’ll almost never find it.

    But yuzu is very different from most citrus fruits. Like most citrus, it has a tart, clean flavor. It’s a little fuzzier than normal. But that’s not what makes it so extraordinary. If you pay attention to where you taste food on your tongue (rather than what it tastes like), you’ll notice that you taste most citrus on the sides and back. Yuzu is extraordinary in that you’ll taste it everywhere you taste citrus normally–and also on the underside of your tongue. It’s a bigger feeling in your mouth than any other citrus.

    The closest I can come to describing how yuzu feels in your mouth is by analogy. If you’ve ever had agro dolce, it feels much the same thing. A really old balsamic–think more than 30 years–will often have the same effect.

    I am addicted to yuzu.



  20. Ervin A.
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    · November 21st, 2007 at 7:41 pm · Link

    Tessa, glad I can make you giggle. I am kind of silly. Everyone thinks so. It’s funny, I haven’t told anyone I was even doing the blog thing, not even my girlfriend. It goes back to that whole topic of criticism and praise. I’m terrified of what people are going to think. But, I figured, what the hell? It could be fun. It’s pretty heavy stuff, some of it anyway. But thank you for taking a look.

    And Courtney, I’ll have to try this Yuzu you’ve described. Sounds yummy. Although I do fear becoming addicted to something else. I’m currently addicted to coffee, before that cigarettes, before that, well…we won’t get into that here. But I’ll be on the lookout for Yuzu. I need some fuzzy on my tongue. Can never have enough fuzzy.

    Have a great holiday, everyone!